a journey to motherhood

Sunday, April 26, 2015

Breaking the ice: How I feel about post mission

It's exactly one month today since I returned from my mission. It is hard and it's getting harder everyday. And because of that reason, I am breaking the ice and I will finally share what I think and feel about returning. A disclaimer though...

To my dearest posterity, yes I know this will reach the social media. 50% of my facebook friends will see this on their feeds. 10% will open the link and finally 4-6 individuals will read the whole entry. Now remember, our goal is to record. Family History baby. If I never taught you this, I am a terrible great great grandmother. If I did, yay! I'm great! I will be great. :D

Okay here we go...

Being a returned missionary is HARD! 

Me at Week 1
hey! seeing everyone is exciting! 
sweet homeward
aahhh i miss home! 
I miss my friends... 
everyone wants to see me, yay!! 
First bake soon!
temple marriage!

Me at Week 2
3F, work please
okay.. i think ill visit some friends..
no, i cant go alone
hmmm.. i think i need to meet this person about work
hmm i dont think so, i think i'll just hang around 
I'll email my mission friends
fb with mission friends..
temple marriage!!

Me at Week 3
plans be real please..
where are my friends?? everyone is busy with their own lives
what is happening to my life.. I need a spiritual recharge
Geez.. I am not using my time wisely! okay, think about VT.. school.. work.. 
I need a planner
I can't even.. what is even happening??? I want to go back to my mission
Temple Marriage!!! 

Me at Week 4
Being a returned missionary is AWESOME! The first few weeks were refiner's fire. But what's the difference, mortality is refiner's fire. I am learning everyday. It's okay to get discouraged. It's okay to feel alone sometimes. It's okay to feel confused about what to do. It's okay if you feel like your plans are less perfect that what you've thought. It's okay to feel scared sometime. Because you know what? You are growing. You are becoming the person Heavenly Father wants you to be. He is allowing you to feel all these because he trusts you. He molded you from the very beginning. You can do it. I can do it. 

Postmission craziness still not over. But here's what. The Atonement is available. Amidst all the challenges I am facing right now inside the own walls of my home and outside, there is the Atonement. I wake up happy everyday. And as long as I keep on pressing forward feasting upon the words of Christ and becoming like my Savior Jesus Christ, I know it will be okay. 

Blessings pour. I can see more opportunities for more education.  I started going to workshops and taking counsels from my family and priesthood leaders. Because it is hard, I seek for more and more guidance and confirmations from my Heavenly Father. I said no to my old job even though I didn't know what alternatives are sure. I just knew it's right. I have a new job now and I am excited to see where it will take me. Friends who are busy takes time to check on me to find out if I need some help. I am making changes and it's great. 

Real score, I will not have it any other way. 

This post is too long for a month's share. :D 
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Monday, April 6, 2015

Home :)

18 months. 18 wonderful months. My misison president counseled me this a few months before the end of my mission " Going home? It's scary huh? The only going home I know is going back home to our Heavenly Father." It's true! My mission doesn't end here. Taking my nametag off was not even a reality to me. It was again bittersweet but I will always wear a nametag in my heart. The mission is not the crowning event of a gospel life. It's eternal marriage! Suffice to say, I am excited and is looking forward to what's next. It's great to be with my family again! My earthly family is my sunshine. I know there will still be ups and downs but I am determined to go home to my Heavenly Father. :)

D&C 132:19 :)

Sister Javelona
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